Friday, November 28, 2008

The Trainer

This is what I like about the me a second.....Oh, wait! I, that's not it.

Today I did this crazy hard workout that really made me sweat. The idea was to keep my RPM's high while going up a mtn and at the top of a mtn. As if the steepest grade (9%) was not hard enough, trying to maintain a high RPM at the top was stupid hard. Sweat was dripping down my scalp!!! I kept thinking about the workout that Jillian gave her group on Biggest Loser (my favorite show). They were doing a spin class for hours and she took their seats off so they had to stand and spin!!! YIKES. That's some crazy shit there!

Anyway. Tomorrow is my day off and I'm trail running up to 10 miles on Sunday. I'm pretty excited about that because my last run was a little over 9 miles and I had an injury. This time around should be better - I hope....

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

The last person picked

When I was growing up I was always the last one picked for just about everything. I never won a prize or award and never competed for anything. Many times I felt like I was just an observer of life looking through a glass box wishing and wanting to participate but never really fitting in anywhere... I just wanted to be part of a group. Any group for that matter...but just a group. Even as adults we look for like minded people to hang with and share food with and laugh with....we are drawn to each least most of us are....

Something happens to a little girl when she's always picked last and always left out. She finds a way to manage, sure, but the pain never really goes away and she can't help but wonder why. Why wasn't I ever picked....why wasn't I good enough for your team....

Over the years I've learned that the same is true for adults. We are very clickish and it's hard to break apart a strong group... No matter how hard I try to fit in or become a part of the group it never really works out. Have you heard that theory about spending time with the people you most want to be most like? Toss that shit right out the door because the people I want to hang with don't have time to wait for me to catch up...

I'm learning more and more about myself these days. I have two different personalities. I'm a very strong leader at work and I'm damn good at what I do. However, once I leave work I become somebody who lacks confidence in any social setting and seeks out the approval of almost everyone I meet. How can this be? So who am I really? Am I strong or not? Am I a leader or follower? What I have learned over the past few weeks is that if I want something I just need to do it on my own. I'm not going to get picked so I'm done waiting to hear my named called. Today I am letting go of the hope that somebody will want me on their team. Today I am letting go of the hurt feelings...the resentment...the confusion and the questions why. It is what it is and that's going to be good enough. It's about me now...and only me....

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

What a whirlwind

Wow, these past 5 days are really a blur. Let's see how much I can remember. Thursday was my first Ironman volunteer day at the registration tent. Let me first say WOW!!! What a well run operation. I picked up some really great ideas. Seeing all the athletes was truly amazing. I can't wait to be a part of that group. Thurs was a quick hike up A mtn when my shift was over.

Thur afternoon I stuffed swag bags for Rick's Mad Mud Run event that was Saturday. Carla from REI and I stuffed bags for over 8 hours!!! My feet, legs, back and hands were exhausted. I don't care if I see another swag (stuff we all get) bag in my life.

Friday was super busy getting everything ready at Rick's race sight and at REI so that day was pretty much was Saturday. Our day started at 3am and ended about 7pm so again, my legs, feet and arms were pretty much toasted.

Sunday at the Ironman again! This is were I really did learn a huge lesson. Watching the transition from swim to bike inside the changing tent gave me great ideas on what I need to do, and the best way to get it done. Those poor athletes were so cold that their teeth were chattering. My first order of business is to get a hood, gloves, booties and a wetsuit with arms. It just looked painful to see them so cold.

Monday was equally COLD! I worked the registration table again where some folks had been in line since 3am! Can you believe this. The line got so long at one point that it was from Tempe Beach Park to the Mill Ave. corner and down the street a ways. WOW! I was so lucky that I got to sign up for Ironman 09 before we even opened the gate.

I ended up in bed at 6pm last night. The exhaustion of 5 straight days on my feet just hit and I was out like a light. I'm glad it's over and to get back to my regular routine! Congrats to Cliff, my swim coach for finishing the Ironman in 16 hours! Nice job.....

This time next year I'll here, Kim Robinson you are an Ironman!

Monday, November 24, 2008

I'm in!

Just a very quick update... I'm registered and paid for the Ironman 2009!!! More info about these past few days coming soon!

Wednesday, November 19, 2008


Do you like being chased? Well, I guess it would depend on the circumstance, right? The right person, the right mood...being chased could be down right fun! I wish I could say that about today's workout. First of all, the chaser was Dave and second, he was chasing ME - total mood killer!!!

We played chase on our bikes today. We've done this before and the idea is that when he starts to get next to me to try and pass, I can't let him...I have to speed up. I know, my first thought was to push him over too but I didn't think his wife Windy would be very happy with me. In addition to being chased we were going up an incline - nice! Okay, I have to admit that this is a great workout for my legs but wow, this was a great cardio workout too. One thing about Dave that I learned a LOONNGGG time ago is that he does not schedule breaks into our workouts. I'm just S.O.L., if you know what I mean. That doesn't mean that he wouldn't give me one if I REALLY needed it so I tried desperately to time our ride so that we would have to stop at every stop light. Eeerrggg.. When I needed it the most that damn light stayed green all the way through!

The ride back to the start was great...all downhill and he stopped chasing me...can't really chase when we are flying at 26mph! Reflecting on today's workout I'm realizing that he never really got next to me that many times but man, the stress of having him behind me really made me work hard. I wanted to cry, toss my cookies AND my bike and push him into traffic all in one workout. I'd call that a pretty good morning :)

Monday, November 17, 2008

A little out of sorts

I'm sure you've had one of those days where your head and body were not communicating very well.... I had one of those mornings. Perhaps it was because I knew I had to be home by 9:30 for a 10:00 appt and I was fearful of the time.... or maybe it was the sudden headache I developed doing chest presses... I'm not completely sure but today's gym workout was not my best performance. Oh well...what the hell. I got it done and made my appointment on time too.

Did I mention that Saturday I took a 4 hour nap after the race? I did and man, I could have pulled an all nighter but the dogs woke me up for dinner. I did not get anything on my to-do list done that day, which included going to a bridal shower and for that I'm sorry :( I can't stop getting up at 3:30 every morning and sometimes it catches up with me. Today is another good day for a nap!!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Results are in

So yesterday I did the Splash n Dash and I'm still trying to decide whether I'm happy about it or not. Here is the deal.....I'm so freaking slow in the water that my competition is in the 65 and older group. How can anyone swim so slow? What the hell is wrong with me? I was pretty frustrated when I had to practically have an asthma attack to try and beat the 71 year old women ahead of me on the run just so I could finish 3rd to last overall. Geez how humiliating. The look on my face in this photo says exactly how I felt the entire race.

Don't get me wrong. I totally get that swimming a mile is a pretty great thing to be able to do. The first person out of the water did it in some crazy time like 28 minutes! Who does that!!! ugh.

So my overall swim time was 55 minutes, which is good enough for the IM so I guess I should be happy about that, right?

Friday, November 14, 2008

The Weekend S & D

Okay, I've been talked into doing the Splash n Dash this weekend. It's a 2000 meter swim followed by a 3k. I've done a mile swim with Rick out at the lake but eeks... it was pretty hard. I don't anticipate any problems as long as I stay calm and focused. This is not for time - just for practice but that doesn't mean I won't try my best to do well.

The swim is followed by a really short run and from my past experience it's sometimes hard to get my head and legs to coordinate after a long swim. Geez, I hope I don't fall over!

Off on a really hard uphill ride again today. I'm just not satisfied if I don't have that lactic burn in my legs ya know... Something is wrong with my head!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

A little swim

I did some swimming today. I haven't been in the pool for a couple of weeks but it sure didn't take long for body to remember what to do. I took it slow and easy putting most of my focus on bilateral breathing (breathing both sides). It's still very uncomfortable so I decided to breath right side up the pool and left side down the pool. This worked well. It provided more opportunities to take a breath and my muscles will grow evenly.

If you haven't noticed I posted my training calendar for you to watch. I'm in "maintenance mode" until January when the real fun begins.... Yeah, I'm really looking forward to 5 hour bike rides....ugh. But that doesn't mean my workouts aren't hard and super fun now. Who doesn't love riding up roads like South Mountain for darn sakes! Why do I like getting my ass kicked so much?

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Damn Bees!

This is the second time I've trained with Dave and been stung by a bee! Give me a break!!!

We rode all the way up South Mtn today just passed the towers. YIKES. I was excited when he first told me we were meeting at South Mountain. I thought we were going to mtn bike....but then I got the real story. From what I can find the elevation gain was over 1300 ft, which is more then Camelback and Squaw Peak! My quads sure could feel it.

I had a little fear going into this ride simply because I'm not a strong uphill rider. Fear of what I'm still trying to figure out. Fear of the pain I would endure - maybe. Fear of falling - not really. Fear of not being able to do it - please! My mental toughness never lets me down. I firmly believe that there is nothing I cannot do and that's the attitude that pushed me up those super steep spots.

Chatting with Dave during the ride kept my mind from thinking about the strain on my quads. We got to the top and found some people parachute jumping!! It was a good rest until a bee went down my shirt and stung me!! Yes, you read that right. The little bastard went down my shirt! I started freakin out trying to get my shirt off as fast as I could but he got me. Dave had to pull the stinger out. It itches and hurts still.

Downhill was not so bad. It was cold and I did hit the breaks probably more then I needed to. With a fun "race" between us at the end, I felt great and pretty proud of not once needing to stop and rest my legs. (I appreciate Dave letting me stay out in front during races...but his front tire always reaches the finish line before mine - as one might expect ;)

Monday, November 10, 2008

A Good Ass Kicking!

Well I'm back at it. I met Dave at the gym for one of my favorite workouts. If I ever have a choice between workouts it will always be the gym...I LOVE IT. Or maybe I love all the mirrors...hummmm Anyway, I was changing shoes before I left and my arms and legs were shaking!

Dave has increased the amount of weight that I lift, which is always okay with me. (I hate it when he hands me anything below 15lbs....hate it!) Rick commented on my arms today... apparently seeing my biceps muscle without flexing is sexy ;) Every muscle from the waist up is sore right now. I think sore muscles release some chemical in my brain that says "give me more!" because I'd do it all again tomorrow if I could. Maybe I should trade in Ironman for a body building contest!!!

So this was a pretty bad week but as always Dave is supportive and positive about where I'm at in my training. Ironman is pretty far away so really I just need to maintain my position until after the New Year. Then it's full on and eeks...I'm scared. He's going to give me a workout schedule that I'll post for you to see. That should keep me on track!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

I'm back

Yep..that's right baby! I'm done with this funk and I'm ready to put my heart back into this. I woke up early and knew that before anything I had to get outside for a run. First things first..I jogged around the block with my dogs for a warm up.

Here we go! I didn't really have a route plan but rather a just get your ass outside plan. I started on 36th and Cactus and ended up on Tatum before I started to feel my calf cinch up on me. This was the slowest jog ever but I started to walk so that my injury did not get worse and maybe work the cramp out some. From Tatum back home I did a walk/jog with the intent of keeping my leg warmed up but not too stressed out. My last mistake was pushing through the pain and now a week later I'm still paying for it.... It so happens that my next event is the Chang's 1/2 marathon and I have no intentions of walking it! It was so slow this morning I'm embarrassed to even call it a jog....but...what am I gonna do....

Good luck to everyone doing the 24hr bike race this weekend. I wish I could do it with you!

Friday, November 7, 2008

To better days

So I'm starting to feel better. Thanks for your emails and messages...and thanks to Christine for the nice bike ride yesterday.

It's been a pretty tough week for me with Rick gone...some post race depression and the lack of desire for anything other then candy bars and TV. I can't remember the last time I exercised so little. Maybe I did a total of 25 bike miles and one gym workout. I'm starting to feel better though. I woke up with a smile and plans for the day so that's a start. Rick will be home in three days so I still have a chance to enjoy this time to myself without indulging in chocolate the entire time.

I'm going for a nice easy jog tomorrow along the canal just to see how my calf feels and to detox some of the crap I've put down my pie-hole (mouth) this week. I'm looking forward to getting outside.....I've been hiding in this house since Monday and it's time to shower, brush my teeth and put my game face back on!


Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Pain...and Recovery

Last Saturday I ran just a little over 9 miles and it was great. I'm a little competitive when I know I can beat somebody and so my usual mind games had me picking people off one by one in order to win a race I concocted until it calf cramped up on me again. This pain is not like your typical muscle cramp. This pain is a deep, really sharp pain that takes several days and sometimes weeks for me to recover from. There I was, upset that my race was disrupted. The pain of walking was worse as my leg would stiffen up so I grit my teeth and shuffled...for about 4 miles. Pretty pissed at this point because I felt super and wanted to challenge my speed.

Yesterday I tried to run again and's not ready yet. It was back to limping as soon as I stopped at just less then a 1/4 mile. I'm pretty frustrated at this point. The older I get the longer it takes to recover.

Rick and I went mountain bike riding and that doesn't really bother my calf much. As long as I stay on pretty flat trails I can manage just fine. By the way - I LOVE my new mountain bike!

Here is a call out to readers. I'm having some motivation challenges. Please, send me your messages of encouragement - they are needed. What challenges have you overcome? I need to hear from you now more then ever since I only see my trainer twice a week. That's 5 days of exercise on my own and it's hard folks...really hard. Here is my hand...reaching out to yours...please help me up.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Stolen Quote

After I posted this morning I found this great quote on the Irongeezelle website.

"It’s not that I had the courage to finish, but that I had the courage to start"

That pretty much says it all for me. I've gotten to the point where I don't understand when somebody doesn't want to push beyond what they know they can do. I don't understand the lack of excitement over some of these races that are real ass-kickers. I no longer understand how fear can dictate a persons life. Why wouldn't you want to see what you're made of? It's not a physical challenge for me but rather a mental one. The challenge will never start if we just continue to do things that we know we can do. How boring is that! Personally I prefer to walk towards my own fears and as long as I continue to do that, I'm a winner!

I'm in a funk

Do you ever feel that way? Like you're stuck in a funk? That's were I'm at now. No less motivated to exercise but bored and not sure what's next for me now that Soma is over. There are some open water swims around Ironman that Cliff told me about...I should probably do those and one is actually the 2.4 miles! Geez...I should try it and see how long it takes me?

Now that it's Nov I'm only seeing Dave twice a week until the end of Jan. Trying to save some $$ since Ironman costs $525 and Christmas is around the corner. It's REALLY stressing me out!! He's like a drug and I need my fix man! Give me my fix!!!

I think I've got some personal issues happening too. I'm turning 40 very soon and as it approaches I find myself looking back on my life and having more regrets then I'd like. Things are shifting and it can be scary.

I'm finally finished with Rick's website so give a look see....