Friday, May 23, 2008

My Struggles

As much as I love training, and I think that's obvious from most of my posts, I'm also having some real internal struggles. I know that with the increased exercise my metabolism is high and for me, that's dangerous! Yesterday I stood in front of the refrigerator with both sides open practically salivating at the mouth - "I'm so hungry" I said, shaking the doors hoping something would fall out like a vending machine. I'm not talking about having the munchies or I'm bored kind of hungry. I'm talking about don't come between me and my dinner plate kind of hungry. Like I'll seriously hurt you if you ask for a bite of my food....get the hell away from me kind of hungry. I want everything that I can't have and that is really making me angry. Then when I eat I get angry at myself for eating it. I'm not stuffing cookie dough down my mouth but I am eating way too many carbs.

Boxing at Butch and Vicki's last night was great. Something happens to me when I put boxing gloves on. I just want to kick everyone's ass..seriously. I start jumping around, pounding my chest all crazy's totally primal. I've got some hidden anger I need to address.

My legs are shot. After 6 minutes of lunges holding 15 pounds followed by some crazy boxing moves as the warm up, I've got nothing left...they are full of lactic acid. I decided that today I was not going to move as much as I could, and that takes skill and planning. If I do peel myself up off the couch it's to achieve three things or I'm not gettin up! I'm running the ARR 5 k tomorrow and I need my legs to be strong.

Okay, my three things have been achieved, it's back to the couch with one stop at the frig on the way....

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